And remember, if you are feeling ashamed about mistakes made and damage done during your using days, you are not your disease. On the surface, making amends might sound as simple as offering a sincere apology for your treatment of others, but there’s more to this cornerstone Twelve Step practice. Below, experts at Hazelden Betty Ford’s Connection™ living amends recovery coaching program answer frequently asked questions about this reconciliation process and why it’s so vital to addiction recovery and spiritual health. Before approaching Step 9, you need to complete the inventory in Step 8. This is a list of all of the people in your life whom you believe you have harmed.

living amends

Whenever possible, those in recovery are encouraged to make direct amends face-to-face with those they’d harmed while living in addiction. Living Amends is committed to helping people in the Austin, TX area stay sober for more extended periods of time. However, we do not pay for anyone’s entire stay in their sober living community because we also recognize each person’s need to have stakes in the process. It proves that they are committed to the recovery process. Whenever possible, a direct amend is made face-to-face rather than over the phone or by asking someone else to apologize on your behalf.

Support for Me and My Family

That is just one small example of what are living amends. Part of my living amends is also being the friend my friends deserve and the employee my employers hired in good faith. Living amends touches deep parts of our lives and souls if we allow them.

Your donation will provide a scholarship to someone in recovery, supporting them through the first few months of sober living in one of our partner organizations. To learn how your gift supports our scholarship, click below. Direct amends refers to going directly to the wronged individual, apologizing and taking whatever action is necessary to correct a situation. If an individual damaged someone else’s home while they were under the influence of drugs or alcohol, direct amends may require that they go to the property owner, apologize and repair damages. Those in recovery are encouraged to make direct amends whenever possible.

Examples of Making Amends in Recovery

People who need addiction treatment come from all backgrounds. Often they may have lost the trust of their friends, family, and others who care about them. Additionally, once they finish treatment, they don’t have the funds to continue on to sober living facilities. Often, when they leave the treatment center, they have nowhere to go except back into the arms of those with whom they used substances in the past.

Sometimes, the outcome can be uglier and downright disappointing. They may refuse to meet at all or refuse to listen to what you have to say. Sometimes it can be hard to know what to say when preparing to make amends. There may be so many times we feel we let someone down that it can be hard to know where to begin. We want to convey our heartfelt remorse but worry that our words will fall short. The goal in making amends is “to freely admit the damage we’ve done and make our apologies,” according to The Big Book.

Danielle Olivera Addresses Lindsay Hubbard and Carl Radke’s Living Situation

If someone does not want to hear from us, we respect that and do our best to move forward with our recoveries. We can also make amends by living very purposefully within the bounds of our principles. For example, if we hurt people with our lying and we cannot make amends without further injuring them, we would make living amends by making a decision to behave and communicate with complete honesty. Think of amends as actions taken that demonstrate your new way of life in recovery, whereas apologies are basically words.

  • I don’t call him to see how his meeting went this week or what step he’s on.
  • Part of my living amends is also being the friend my friends deserve and the employee my employers hired in good faith.
  • The newest change will help those response times, Schilling said.
  • We came from very humble beginnings, and would love to tell you our story of success and recovery.
  • We require recipients to pay 25% of the first month’s rent at their sober living facility.
  • There may be so many times we feel we let someone down that it can be hard to know where to begin.

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